Let’s talk about the “Mommy Guilt” … keeping that teeter totter balance of sanity & sunshine between life, our kids, our relationships, our jobs & everything else MOM we deal with every.single.day… about seeking that fine line of strategic strategizing of “How do we build our beloved businesses when life seems to be going haywire?!”
I have a lot of moms that are juggling spouses, business partners, they work full time, or part time, volunteer, community contributors, & there’s a teeter totter balance that we are juggling, sometimes struggling to keep.
My girlfriends & I were just talking about Mommy Guilt the other day, so whether you’re in my team of Social Retail or your own company out there I want to share some tips, tricks and solutions to what we call “The Sunny Side of Life”!
Catch my deeper insights here;
It’s a Mom thing would you agree “We want everyone to be happy”.
If we think about it, the word MOM is a verb. It’s an action. It’s something we do. Mom’s like it when “everybody is happy”. We want to make sure everyone in our world is joyous, empowered, excited as we are! Everything is in its place & space. Right?
But sometimes we can feel that Mommy Guilt, that weight, stress, worry, frustration that we feel that we’ve dropped the ball sometimes, that something didn’t go “as planned”.
The thing is, if we can we need to find ways so we don’t beat ourselves up mentally or emotionally, talk negatively to ourselves. Number one, it’s a big time sink that really isn’t helpful, but also because sometimes there’s physical ramifications such as falling into depression, physical impact of stress, distraction of what is going on “here & now”… The struggle IS real!
It’s also super important to ensure your “Belief System” … Your internal self worth setting is at the top of its game, that you Value YOU! That you pour into you enough, because we know, we can’t help others without helping ourselves first!
Lets hop into 8 Tips that have been super helpful!
~ 1 ~ Share with you is making sure that your partner understands what is going on within YOUR world.
Let’s be honest, sometimes they don’t have a clue. We nor our partners are psychic, (my husband lovingly says I’m psychotic, the other “P” word haha) But seriously, they can’t read our minds so it’s really important to let your partner know why you’re in a “Network Marketing” business. Your passion, purpose or pleasure.
Maybe you’re looking for something special of your own, we get the labels of mom & wife, corporate worker or hairstylist ect (you get my drift) … but often we want something for US.
Make sure you tell your partner what you’re looking for, maybe it’s recognition, maybe you’re in a really sucky job & the environment isn’t really positive. Maybe it’s the desire to pitch into the family budget, or have that sisterhood / community you are missing. You have to let your partner know what you’re looking for within your network marketing business so he/she can cheer you on!
So they can be an amazing supporter & helper with that balance with life, business, kids & any other “hat” (job) that you might have! This will empower you as a woman, knowing your partner is in your corner, holding your hand!
~ 2 ~ Designate a your “Work Space”. I encourage you to find a specific designated work space spot TOTALLY different than the ones you usually spend time in. My husband knows when I am sitting at my “Big Black Betty” computer, I am working. When I am curled up on the couch & my phone is nearby, I might be catching a cute kitten video! Haha!
The thing is when we work from a different table, desk, or a spare room, when we carve out “a space” our children & our partner can swiftly identify “this is where mommy does the special works”. So they can understand that if mommy is over “there” she is working.
~ 3 ~ “Just give me 5 minutes” If your children are coming to you (young or old) & “needing mom”; we can feel super guilty, beat ourselves up mentally when we say “just give me 5 minutes”. I advise you to give in to the distraction of your children if it’s minor or major. Why?, because you’re going to be distracted by wondering what your kids wanted & it increases that Mommy Guilt feeling! Then go back to your task at hand so you can give it one hundred percent of your attention.
If you are working on something really significant & can’t break free of the task at hand, make a game out of it!
You can make up a “funny face at them” that’ll let them know that you need just 10 minutes. Grab your egg timer, put it in your work area, they will know when you make that “special funny face”, they will set the timer for 10 minutes & when it goes off they can come back to you knowing Mom is done. By that time you can finish that business call, or that mind thought that you had. Make a plan, share the game with them! Of course, keep your word & promises to them!
~ 4 ~ Drop “Perfect”. So many times I’m having this conversation; they’re seeing this other idea “perfect” mommies out there. I personally can relate to a “hot mess” way more than I can to the perfect plastic Barbie doll world. Often trying to cover up their own insecurities & worries, keeping up with the “Jones” so to speak. I encourage you, nothing is more endearing than YOU being REAL.
So go with the milk spilt on the back seat, French fries & shriveled up carrot sticks on the floor. No one ever has everything together. If your life is crazy, upside down, people can relate to that! That is totally duplicatable.
The fake world of Barbie, isn’t. That’s not sustainable, it’s not real, so stop trying to fake it to make it. You are just going to burn our selves out, drive our selves more crazy seeing that perfection. Done is better than perfect.
We have to remember that when we take off that mask of perfection we can make that deeper connection. That’s what’s MOST important! That can create great conversation! So drop that Mommy Guilt of your hot mess Embrace it & share it out that you are ROCKIN the hot mess momma & building your empire while walking like King Kong on the Legos on the floor!
~ 5 ~ Have a family to-do list for your home. I was a single mom for more than a few years, I can honestly say “I couldn’t do it all”! And I told this to my kids “this is OUR home, we’re going to take care of it together!”. I’ll be getting ready to go to my 12 hour work shift & getting ready to put a load of laundry on & I would say “Ok! C’mon kids we’re going to play the laundry game!” And everyone had to go run around the house & find every item of clothing that was dirty & we made a game of it. Doing something together! You can do the same thing for the dishes, or for dusting or vacuuming or even kitchen meal prep!
This teaches your kids life skills & you get much more stuff done FASTER. Plus creating family time without the distraction of electronic devices. Plus the sense of pride of caring for their home is irreplaceable. Them knowing YOU are not the laundry fairy. Haha!
~ 6 ~ Hire Them! I know a lot of mommies have older children, they are so tech savvy! Teens nowadays are so technologically smart! You want them on your team, take advantage of their enthusiasm, passion & excitement. I know some moms have signed their kids up some WordPress or SEO courses, content creation, copy writing for stories & articles, photography, imagery creation, videographer, video editing. Include your kids!
Reduce your Mommy Guilt by inviting them into your entrepreneurial world in ways they can pitch in, contribute & be a part in your success! They would love to snap photo’s, do videos of you & fun creative things! Include your older children. And with the young ones, you can grab a notebook and make a “personal to-do list” of your daily activity plan (DMO) & let them know when they can cross something out of the list …“Mommy gets two stars!”.
It’s so powerful to talk about “your day” with your kids, include them with what you are doing & your experiences: “mommy had this conversation & this is what she learned”. Share your daily story, the adventure of your trials & tribulations, show them that you are stubborn, creative & tenacious about your dreams & goals.
~ 7 ~ Give Back! How many of you gals have kids that are in sports? Use your entrepreneurial mommy skills & help them sell more cookies, or sell more raffle tickets! Take some time to think about what you’re doing & share it forward into your community & your kids. This is a perfect way to KEEP Social, network and connect with other Mommies out there & help push away the loneliness that we can sometimes feel.
I really had much fun with this blog, I hope you enjoyed it as the struggle is real when it comes to feeling Mommy Guilt, balancing that teeter todder of “life” as we know it! ! Of course if you did, you are welcome to share this forward to a friend in need!
See you on The Sunny Side of Life!
P.S. I often get asked; Roxanne when you are not being a “Cheerleader” in all women’s lives, sharing sparks of joy and insights; what else do you have going on? Well … I have a blooming business within Social Retail 🙂 Don’t know what Social Retail and the power of Social Marketing is? My Sunny Side of Life details can be best explained here; www.roxannelynch.info
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